


In A Little While

by slash4femme



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: M/M, Pon Farr, angst and rough sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-08
Updated: 2015-05-08
Packaged: 2018-03-29 14:30:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3899731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slash4femme/pseuds/slash4femme
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>they are both afraid of what this will mean and all the things left unsaid.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In A Little While

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written in 2009. I do not change/edit my older works, just upload them here. 
> 
> The dreaded pon farr fic. This story was extremely hard for me to write and took me forever. The title is taken from a song title by U2

1.

If you’d have asked him six months ago Dr. Leonard McCoy would have told you that he was the last person in the known universe to become a Vulcan advocate. McCoy had always been about as big a fan of Vulcan’s as the next human who had come to the realization that they would always be second pick for any job where a Vulcan was also a candidate. Sure he didn’t hate the logic machines with a deep and fiery passion, he just never really thought that much about them. Vulcans were Vulcans stranger and, well, more alien then humans but in the great scheme of things not that big a part of his life.

Then things had change. He’d stood and watched as Vulcan was destroyed, and millions of Vulcans killed. His ship, and sickbay had suddenly become the last refuge for all of the surviving Vulcan elders and a large portion of other Vulcans.

And then there was Spock.

McCoy spent a good deal of time telling himself, just because his partner was half-Vulcan did not mean he had to become the defender of the whole damn race. He kept telling himself that, in the vain hope eventually he’d start acting like it was true. Still he’d started to watch himself.Started try not to blame everything that irritated him about Spock, and by God, the irritating things that man could do, on only half of his genetics. He’d give anyone, even Jim, a look if they made fun of Vulcans in anyway that wasn’t good-natured. He even found himself haggling with space-command over medical supplies to be sent to the Vulcan colony.

“Look.” McCoy waved his arms, “Vulcans are very susceptible to Adrionic fever especially in the cooler months which that planet tends to have a lot of. All I’m asking here is for there to be a medical drop off every three months instead of every six.”

“We understand your concern Doctor McCoy and we share it, but the Federation is a big place and the Vulcan colony more then capable of taking care of itself.”

McCoy gritted his teeth. The commander’s tone made it quite clear he thought McCoy’s sudden interest in the Vulcan colony was due solely to his relationship with Spock. McCoy hated it even more because he knew the commander was right. If not for Spock he’d care, but not this personally.

“We’ll talk about this later. Sir.” He ground out and made sure he flipped the com-link off before adding “you pig-headed, small-minded, idiot.”

He’d just settled down to do some paperwork and blow off steam when his office door chimed. He looked up to see Spock standing quietly just within the doorway.

“Can I help you?” McCoy looked at the first officer who inclined his head slightly.

“I do indeed have something I wish to speak to you about Doctor.” Spock informed him in his quiet measured voice.

“Well?” McCoy tapped one finger against the edge of his datapad.

“I had hoped.” Spock laced his fingers together in front of him “to speak to you about this when you returned to our quarters tonight however it soon became apparent to me that you would in fact be working late.” McCoy blinked and wondered if he’d just been lightly scolded. “This matter is of a personal nature.” Spock continued on “and concerns us both.”

McCoy arched one eyebrow at Spock a pretty good imitation of the man himself really, and Spock’s lips almost twitched into a smile, almost. “And what’s that Spock?”

“I am referring to pon farr.”

McCoy’s eyes snapped up to meet Spock’s suddenly very serious. “And you think this is going to be an issue soon?”

Spock’s eyebrows arched “I am approaching that time Leonard.”Spock informed him. “I had always I assumed when the time came I would return to Vulcan to be with whomever had been decided upon as a proper mate.” Spock spread his hands. “This is no longer an option.”

McCoy swallowed. “Yeah I’d thought of that.” He rubbed one hand across his forehead. “As your doctor I did some research a while back, and I have to say Spock. I don’t know, I really don’t.I don’t know how this will work, here on the ship, and I’m human . . .” He trailed off his mind replaying the things he couldn’t say, _I have no idea what to do for you, how this works, we don’t have a mental bond, I’m not sure I’m ready, I don’t think I’ll ever be ready._

“I too am somewhat at a loss as to how to proceed under these circumstance Leonard.” Spock informed him quietly.

McCoy looked up at the other man and suddenly was overwhelmed by how young Spock really was. He laid his hand flat on the table beside his notepad. “We’ll figure it out Spock.”He promised Spock merely arched one eyebrow at him.

 

2.

Although it had been several months since his is originally research McCoy knows all the symptoms of pon farr. He’s memorized everything he could find about the fever, shaking, and aggression. It hadn’t been the easiest thing to do, Vulcans seemed to not write or speak about it very often, the best he could come up with had been several highly technical medical journal articles in Vulcan that had been stored in one of the Federation Library data-bases. It’s a shame, McCoy thinks, that the young Vulcan doctor that had written them was probably dead. McCoy also knows that Vulcan males usually think of pon farr as shameful and a weakness which could mean Spock might trying and fight it for as long as possible. On the other hand Spock is half-human, and undeniably so. McCoy can’t even begin to guess how that will change the equation. On top of all that McCoy knows that once pon farr begins Spock will have to mate with someone or risk death. Mate with someone he’s also mentally bonded to. 

McCoy rubs one hand across his forehead; the whole thing makes him want to drink heavily. He controls the impulse. Tapping his fingers on the top of his desk ideally watching Chapel tidy up sickbay. Maybe it will be easier on everyone if he simply asks Jim to bring Spock to the Vulcan colony and leave him there until all of . . . this, is over. 

 

3.

“I do not wish to return to the Vulcan colony.” Spock speaks as soon as McCoy fully through the door and McCoy looks up in surprise. 

Spock is sitting at his computer consol in their shared quarters and he meets McCoy’s gaze calmly. “That is what you are planning on asking is it not?”

McCoy opens and then shuts his mouth finally nodding. Spock’s gaze falls to the desk and he twines his fingers together. “I would ask, Leonard,” he says softly. “If the request that I return to my own people is motivated by the fact that you do not feel yourself capable of mating with me or because you do not wish to?” 

He finally meets McCoy’s eyes and McCoy sighs running his fingers through his hair and then rubbing both hands across his face. “I’m not Vulcan Spock, we’ve never mentally bonded, and if we do this, it would be in some ways like . . .” McCoy makes a vague gesture in the air with one hand, _like being married again_ , “more of a long term thing and we’ve never talk about how long term this is anyway.”

For a long moment Spock does not answer only gazes down at his hands and then unwinds them laying them flat. 

“It has been a long time since I have wished to be bonded to a Vulcan.” Spock says quietly, so quietly McCoy has to take a pace forward to hear him. “And I would remind you Doctor that I’m not entirely Vulcan either.” McCoy blinks and Spock meets his eyes with that strange not quite defiance that has always made McCoy pulse quicken.

“With your human genetics and the changes that’s caused to your anatomy and physiology you might not even experience pon farr.” McCoy points out knowing full well it’s wishful thinking. Spock does him the small courtesy of not pointing that out. 

Spock stands in one long gracefully movement and comes around the desk to stand close but not quite touching McCoy. He clasps his hands behind his back and small gesture he has begun to display on the bridge. 

“I wish to be bonded to no one but you.” He tells McCoy softly. “But I will only if you allow it.” He tilts his head to one side for a moment considering. “And I would prefer if you also wished us to be bonded, not simply allowed such a bonding to take place.” 

McCoy hears the tentativeness to Spock’s voice and knows what such an admission must cost him. Spock is for all his human genetics still terribly Vulcan. He leans forward and gently touches Spock’s cheek, letting his fingers trace the other man’s angular features. _I love you_ , McCoy knows it’s true, knows it’s been true for a long time, but he doesn’t say it out loud.

 

4.

The fever does take Spock although they both hoped it wouldn’t. McCoy writes Spock off duty for a few days and sends him to their quarters. McCoy himself stays in his office for a long time. He never had given Spock an answer and he knows Spock does not expect him to come at all. McCoy gets up and leaves his office, almost without realizing it making his way to the abandon observation deck. Once there he leans against the railing feeling the cool metal bite into his hands, looking out at the stars. Vertigo; he used to feel like he was falling whenever he looked at space, now all that he can see is the beauty of it. He sighs closing his eyes for a long moment. They are so ill suited for this, he and Spock. So often at odds with each other and themselves. It cannot last, cannot withstand both of their wills, stubbornness, and duty to this ship, to Jim. McCoy knows though that he’s in love and that will not change.

He turns and leaves the observation deck. 

Spock is doubled over in pain on the bed when McCoy enters the room, his breathing ragged, coming through clenched teeth. McCoy moves swiftly across the room catching the other man by the shoulders, checking his pulse and trying to get a good look at his eyes to make sure this isn’t anything it’s not supposed to be. Like he’d be able to tell either way. 

“I am here.”He shuts his eyes and presses his face into the crook of Spock’s neck, breaths in the clean, dry, sent of him that has grown much stronger then McCoy is used to. Spock is shaking, unbelievably hot to the touch, a slow dark green flush crawling up his neck. “I am here. Spock.” McCoy says softly, does not say he’s terrified of this, the finality and intimacy of it. He pulls away and cups Spock’s face in his hands sees that Spock’s pupils are dilated, his jaw clenched tightly. “I love you.” McCoy tells him, “Spock my darlin’” He feels like he’s babbling and doesn’t like that his hands shake. Spock’s hands come up slowly, close tight but not painfully around McCoy’s wrists. Spock’s stands pushing McCoy back slightly. He let’s go of McCoy’s wrists and McCoy lets them drops his sides. One of Spock’s hands is light on his waist, the other rises and Spock leans forward slightly as if to kiss him. 

It is such a simple thing really. 

One minute they are standing close, Spock’s amazingly hot body almost touching his own. Spock’s hand is burning against his waist and face and then Spock is in his mind. It’s not comfortable really. McCoy is human and not used to having someone inside his head with him. Spock is like fire, like an alien sun burning across the sky, or desert storms, like coming out of the shade into the full heat of a Georgian summer. McCoy thinks he might have gasped and he can hear Spock make a soft noise inside his head. 

_Leonard_ Spock says inside both of their minds and only then does McCoy feel Spock’s desire, his want and urgency. They kiss, lips coming together in a hard clash of teeth and tongues. Spock is the first to pull away, shaking even harder and gasping for breath. He pulls McCoy forcibly, flush against him, and McCoy feels like he might be burned by the contact. He doesn’t pull away though only presses closer twining his fingers in Spock’s hair, kissing him again rough and fierce with the need they are now sharing. It crackles between them, this desire, and McCoy feels he might die from it himself soon if it is not eased. 

_Please_ he begs inside their minds  _please Spock_ , and Spock makes a sound deep in his chest like a growl. Spins them both and pushes McCoy forcibly onto the bed. Spock’s need and desperation washes over McCoy like a wave and he desperately fights to rid himself of his boots and uniform top while Spock almost rips down McCoy’s pants. McCoy reaches up towards Spock but the other man had turned away fumbling with something. Spock dropped the small tube on the bed and McCoy gasped when on of Spock long and now slick fingers enters him.  _Spock._ Need washes over him and he can hear Spock’s heavy breathing, feel how much the other man’s hands are shaking. Spock is trying to be gentle but McCoy knows he can’t last, McCoy grits his teeth.  _Spock, please, now, please._ There is one long aching moment and then Spock’s there towering above him pushing into him and McCoy gasps fisting into the covers on the bed, it’s been far too God damn long. He concentrates on breathing, concentrates on relaxing, on the frankly amazing feel of Spock, so hot, so burningly hot inside of him. 

_Leonard_ , Spock is repeating his name over and over in both their minds like a mantra and Spock has always been unnervingly silent during sex, but he isn’t now that they are connected like this. Spock begins to thrust into him long, firm and deep. McCoy feels his own arousal building increased also by the fact he can feel Spock’s as well building out of control. Spock’s hands are like brands on McCoy’s hip and thigh, hard enough that he knows he will have bruises in the morning. It doesn’t take them long. McCoy can feel his own orgasm building but it’s Spock’s, coming down at them both with a power and force McCoy had never experienced before, that carries them both over the edge. They come simultaneous Spock crying out in both their minds. McCoy collapses back on the bed and Spock draws out of him as gently as possible still causing McCoy to wince slightly. Spock comes to lie next to him gently spooning his body stroking his hair, but McCoy can still feel the intense need rippling across their linked minds. 

“Give me a minute.” McCoy turns his face into the pillows on the bed trying to catch his breath. Spock touches his face again his hand still shaking but not as badly now, _I am sorry_. 

_You got nothing to be sorry for._ McCoy thinks but he’s only just begun forming the words to say allowed when Spock flips them both over, in one fluid terrifying act of raw strength, until Spock is lying on his back, McCoy straddling him. McCoy sighs as Spock runs overheated fingers up his chest. He has the feeling this is going to be a very long night. 

  
5.

Spock is asleep with one arm flung across McCoy chest. McCoy moves Spock’s arm and slides out of bed. Spock skin is still hotter then it should be but the fever has gone down. In the bathroom McCoy turns on the shower to an actual water setting and steps under the spray. He sighs tilting his head to the side and carefully catalogs the bruises and parts of his body that hurt. All in all no actual serious damage done and it’s not like he hasn’t had rough nights before. 

He can feel the mental link too, still there in the back of his mind. It isn’t distracting or uncomfortable anymore just a kind of mental pressure that he can’t really describe. He’s not sure he likes it exactly yet, but that might take time. He sighs, rolling his shoulders against the water trying to loosen their ache a little bit. He’s pretty sure the worst is over now. Spock might be a little more dominant and aggressive for the next few days, but McCoy can’t really see anymore relentless fucking in their future anytime soon. He’s pretty damn grateful for that, he’s not twenty anymore after all. He sighs again, turns off the water and loops a towel loosely around his waist. 

He walks back over to the bed and stands there looking down at the other man. Spock looks peaceful when he sleeps, more human really.His dark lashes fall across only slightly flushed cheeks. Spock’s face is half hidden pressed against a pillow and some of his hair is sticking up slightly from a combination of sleep, sweat and the lube they managed to spill at some point. McCoy wrinkles his nose slight, but sits on the bed anyway running one hand lightly cross the dark hair that forms almost a perfect heart on Spock’s chest. Spock moves slightly in his sleep but doesn’t wake; unusual for him because Spock is the lightest sleeper McCoy’s ever shared a bed with. The unusually deep sleep though must be a side affect of pon farr because Spock’s skin is still unusually hot even for a Vulcan and McCoy still damp hand must be colder then normal even for a human. He traces the definition of the muscles on Spock’s chest, gently carts his fingers through the hair there, traces along the other man’s neck, Spock stirs slightly in his sleep moving closer and pressing into McCoy’s touch. McCoy finally draws away from Spock searching until he finds a part of the sheet cleaner then the rest and smoothes it out covering as much of the bed as possible with it then unwinds the towel from his waist dropping it on the floor by the bed. He lies back down and gently spoons against Spock, curving his body around the slightly smaller man. He sighs one last time, letting a hand come to rest against Spock’s chest and closes his eyes. They still have a few more hours left to sleep.

 

  



End file.
